Real Luxury

 

The Next Step

During Big Nasty Trauma #3 in 2020, I discovered Lucy Wyndham Read on YouTube.  First, I think it's truly remarkable that I was doing things like exercise whilst I was going through something really, really awful (and it didn't  even have anything to do with the pandemic!).    It is something to think about later...

It was a challenge that caught my eye... seven minutes for seven days, and I thought that was do-able for me.  

Later years I only managed to workout during the holidays and summer, and it was depressing  when I went back to work because I just didn't have the energy to do more than my job.  I was gaining weight (which just made it even harder for me to move), and I was too tired to do a lot of anything. 

It took an embarrassing amount of time for me to understand/ accept the issues.  It was when I was on my way back from the emergency room in July that I realised I couldn't do both.  I can't work and do all the things I believe I need to do to get healthy.  I couldn't eat, sleep or even exercise properly.  

So I made a choice.  I chose me.  

I still have a bunch of things to sort out but I know what I need to do.  So doing one thing at a time, I will eventually get there.   

I am already doing well with nutrition and sleep, so it's the exercise I need to get established now.  I really do want to exercise every day, but I will have to be careful for a while.   

I had Lucy in mind for when I was ready to start.  Her  exercise videos have grown in number and inclusiveness.   From five to fifteen minute programs, seated,  mobility and somatic workouts there seems to be no limit to what Lucy is willing to try just to reach everyone.  

Now that I have been given clearance to exercise I will be using Lucy's workouts to begin with.  Starting with this one: 

5 Minute Mobility

I am cautiously optimistic and hopeful for what Lucy calls "your future health."

Sinkholes

I had my post-op checkup with my doctor day before yesterday.  Everything is fine...my pathology was good, my incisions have mostly healed, the bruises are gone. 

So yesterday I fell into a sinkhole (my name for an emotional low).  Everything felt oppressing, I was tired, scared, raw and vulnerable. I startled easily.

I can't seem to be able to shut off my mind when this happens. I'm always trying to figure out what is wrong, what triggered this etc.,  And the best that I can determine from this ruminating is that I am now beginning to process this latest event, now that it has been officially concluded. 

So while I was in this sinkhole, I practiced self-compassion by soothing myself in healthy ways.   I  really wanted to binge on something but since I've been a homebody for over a month now, all I had was good, healthy leftovers to snarf down (my usual binge foods would have made me very sick... high fat and or high sugar).  I have absolutely no interest in those kinds of foods anymore.  I had a container of penne with a creamy pesto sauce (all plant based).  Perfect comfort food.  I've been measuring out portions for months now (since the first attack), and after the surgery I have been eating about a cup of food at each meal.  So really, it wasn't so much as a binge but me having a yummy bowl of pasta every few hours 😋 

I can't stress enough the importance of high quality leftovers.

I also had a bubble bath, washed my hair and put on my comfiest sweats and  hoodie.  Tapped some coloring pages, read some fan fiction.  Rested.  

Everytime I started to ruminate again, I reminded myself that I had just gone through something stressful, and that I needed time to process and heal.

So love and compassion really do work when you figure out what that means for yourself. 

I feel better today and I'm happy with myself for not being destructive but nurturing instead.  Good Job me!

Love and Hearts

Every Sunday, Lennnie the Blob sends a reel to my Instagram app.  It's loving, supportive, and very intuitive.  Somehow Lennnie always knows what I need to hear 💖

I have shared many of Lennnie's reels to my loved ones as they manage to say what I have not been able to as an awkward, anxious introvert. 

 So thanks Lennnie!  You are a rock star 💝

If you're not into Instagram you can also find Lennnie on YouTube 

It's Lennnie

The Joy of Coloring

 

I am beginning this month's Awesome Apps feature with Happy Color.  I have been using this app for a few months now and I have found it to be really useful in a couple of ways. 

 First,  I have it on my phone so it is lightweight and portable. 

Second, it is a joy to use.  The colors just flow in a way that does something neat to my brain, everything is gorgeous and the palettes are so beautiful.  There is so much variety.  Happy Color has been around for a few years so there is a lot to choose from. I love colors, and I love looking at beautiful pictures so this really appeals to me. There is a video of your coloring after you have finished.  I have fun sharing them to Instagram.

Third, as a therapy I use it in a few different ways.  I found it to be calming after a day at work.  As an introvert it is a great way for me to recharge after having to do stuff with people.   It's also a great way to practice mindfulness.   I can't sit in lotus position for too long anymore to meditate as my knee bugs me after a while, so this is a good alternative.   There are these mandalas to do that, if you plan carefully, are very rewarding to do as they take mindfulness and focus to achieve and there is the reward when you finish of a really neat show ( which also does neat stuff to my brain).

Fourth, there is no clutter of coloring books, pens, pencils etc which appeals to me.  I already have an excess of stuff which is stressful whenever I look at it.  

I trialed this app last spring for the library... I wanted to find options for mindful coloring to promote during Mental Health Month, and decided to keep this app.  

 It's really worth paying a few dollars to get rid of the ads.   

You can find the app here at Happy Color